Oct 14, 2017

You guys, I think about weight loss/exercise/healthy eating stuff a lot. Like, daily. But I don’t write about it because I don’t have any great answers or new insights and I wish I were making more progress, but the reality is I’m not really at the moment. And sometimes I think about committing myself to some new self-imposed program to get back on track, but the honest truth is that I’ve done that so many times and the thought of doing it again is just exhausting. Especially since the phase of life I’m in right now isn’t super conducive to specific plans. 

Like, even if I wake up at 6am, I’m still likely to end up nursing the baby instead of exercising. And as much as I’d love to plan a bunch of healthy meals, the reality is they just take more prep time, often right at dinner time before the dish is made, which I just can’t count on getting when there are three little people who need me for a variety of things at all times. But also, those seem like lame excuses? Probably because they are? 

My (fairly realistic) dream is to just sign up for a weights class a few times a week and go walking the other days and get all my exercise in without having to think about it or re-commit to it each day, but I also don’t want to spend money on a class or gym membership right now. 

And I want to compliment the healthy exercise with lots of veggies and healthy delicious foods. I really don’t want to be on a diet or count calories again. Gestational diabetes earlier this year was awful and gave me a whole new appreciation for being able to eat a wide variety of things. But I don’t want to eat so much that I get wide either. I want to live in a way that’s healthy and sustainable long-term, but it’s hard to strike a balance between so many things. And it’s hard to break free of the sugar/chocolate addiction, especially when I’m using it to compensate for, ya know, having little kids around all day needing me all the time. 

I know from experience that I do better with a specific plan, but I also know that it’s really hard to stick to a plan when it doesn’t seem to be giving results. Or when it gives results too fast and leaves me feeling sore. Ha! 

Anyway, I told you I had nothing new to add. I just want to be better and look better and feel better and it’s hard and time-consuming and I’d rather be sewing or knitting or doing something more fun and not sweaty, but I also wish I were sewing and knitting for a body with a more defined waist so… there you go.