Jun 21, 2017

As much as I’ve been joking about wanting the baby to come early, it really wasn’t until yesterday that I started feeling genuinely ready. 

The kids and I went to my final doctor appointment yesterday where I hugged the tech who’s done all my ultrasounds for the past several weeks and the kids and I gave her some chocolate and either because of that or because Olivia was there for the first time and so into it or because the kids told her it was my birthday she went all out and showed us the baby’s sweet little profile and pointed out everything to Olivia and even busted out the 3-D ultrasound which I had never seen before. It was fun to see the kids get so excited and at the end of the day after all the birthday celebrations and cousins to play with I asked Olivia what her favorite part of the day was and she said, “Seeing baby Henry’s face.”

It was also good and focusing and grounding to get to talk to the doctor who’s scheduled to deliver me about how it’ll all go and what will happen when so I know in general what to expect. Not that I haven’t had c-sections before, but it’s a new (to me) hospital and doctor and it was good to get it all laid out. 

Plus there was just a good sense of closure I wasn’t expecting–nor did I realize how much I needed–about getting to go to that last doctor appointment and checking off that final mental box. It feels good to say out loud over and over again to receptionists and nurses and all the other random medical staff that you’re DONE. 

So, the c-section is scheduled for just a little under a week from now and I feel comfortable (figuratively, not actually) and at  peace just hanging out with the kids this week and making the most of our two-on-one time before the baby comes. Today we went to the splash pad and I helped Olivia start sewing a little pin cushion she wanted to make. Trying to mentally gear up for offering to let them do some painting tomorrow. 

There’s just this overarching calm right now. It’s the calm of finally feeling truly ready.